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Apologizing After a Fight with your Manager |Dodging Landmines

If you said things to your boss you regret, don't ignore it and let emotions fester. Ed Muzio, CEO of Group Harmonics, suggests you apologize immediately. Keep the apology separate from the issue you argued about, which may be something that still needs to be resolved. You can have that conversation once both of you have cooled down.

Speaker: Ed Muzio, CEO, Group Harmonics

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Tags: Landmine, Dodging Landmines, fight, boss, manager, apology

 

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Apologizing After a Fight with your Manager |Dodging Landmines

If you said things to your boss you regret, don't ignore it and let emotions fester. Ed Muzio, CEO of Group Harmonics, suggests you apologize immediately. Keep the apology separate from the issue you argued about, which may be something that still needs to be resolved. You can have that conversation once both of you have cooled down.

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>> Let's say I had a fight with my manager, it was pretty bad and I said a lot of things that I regret. What should I do to repair this relationship?

>> Well uh oh so that's a bad thing but the good news is you're saying you want to deal with it and that's absolutely the right answer. What you don't want to do is sort of ignore it, sweep it under the rug, let it fester. So you want to go to your manager and you want to be specific about things you want to apologize for and you want to apologize. Say look I feel like I crossed the line when I said this or that and I am sorry and I'll try not to get so.

>> Well I was really mad though.

>> And maybe rightfully so but if you, if you are recognizing each apologize it's the right answer.

>> So get the emotion out of it?

>> Get the emotion out of it and separate what you're apologizing for in terms of what you said from the conversation you were having, which you felt strongly about, which maybe isn't resolved yet.

>> But if I apologize won't I come across as weak? I don't want to look weak.

>> Well I don't think so because first of all I think by apologizing in a sense you look stronger because you're sort of being the bigger person and saying I made a mistake but beyond that as long as you separate whatever the issue was that got you to that emotional state you can say look we were having a conversation about how the work is assigned and I have some strong feelings about that and I still have some strong feelings about that and I'd like to discuss those with you at a later time. But for now, I want to let you know that the strength of my emotion caused me to say some things that I regret. I apologize I will try hard not to go there again and personalize it in our next conversation about this.

>> What I'm hearing though is I should have more than 1 conversation. It's not just 1, it should be 2 conversations.

>> It's 2 conversations and best kept separate. Deal with the apology that's hard enough and then

>> Get that over with.

>> Get that over with; get that out of the way. Be sincere. Be honest and then come back later and revisit whatever the issue is being careful not to get overly emotional again.

>> In summary.

>> In summary address what you want to apologize for. Make the apology. Separate it from whatever other issue is going on and then address that issue at a later date.

==== Transcribed by Automatic Sync Technologies ====