-
1
05/31/07 | Report as spam
Pregnancy Politics @ work
These pointers essentially combine to form Best Practices or what I will call Pregnancy Politics that all expectant parents might consider turning reviewing.
Be emotionally intelligent about managing these realities- not everyone is family-centered. It may be best to share such blessed news on a need to know basis. This is truly a private matter that should be handled with great care.
Coretta Jackson
Businessethos.com
-
2
05/31/07 | Report as spam
Pregnancy Politics @ work
These pointers essentially combine to form Best Practices or what I will call Pregnancy Politics that all expectant parents might consider reviewing.
Be emotionally intelligent about managing these realities- not everyone is family-centered. It may be best to share such blessed news on a need to know basis. This is truly a private matter that should be handled with great care.
Coretta Jackson
Businessethos.com
-
3
06/01/07 | Report as spam
Outrageous
I find some of the suggestions in this article are outrageous. The health of a pregnant woman and her baby should be the FIRST and FOREMOST concern, never mind appearances. I mean really, with the number of people out there who use their sick time for vacation purposes - a preganant woman experiencing morning sickness has a legitimate reason for not being at work. How useful can you be at work if it is spent kneeling on the floor in the office bathroom? And as far as arranging short term disability, morning sickness can be here one day and gone the next - it is entirely unpredictable. Apparently, the person who wrote this article has never experienced severe morning sickness, and is so absorbed in the concept of "Pregnancy Politics" that they've lost touch with reality.
-
4
06/01/07 | Report as spam
Read it again
The author was simply emphasizing the importance of communication with your boss, should certain aspects of your pregnancy prevent you from fulfilling your basic job reponsibilities. This includes being present and on time. Pregnancy does not authorize you to be undependable.
Yes, there may be days when morning sickness prevents you from being on time, but if it going to be a routine occurrance you need to communicate with your boss to see if some type of an arrangement can be made to either take partial days sick leave or modify your schedule to accomodate your situtation. The absolute worst way to deal with it is to show up 2 hours late without calling and expect the words "Sorry morning sickness" to make everything OK.
You will alienate not only your boss, but your co-workers.
-
5
08/31/07 | Report as spam
I disagree
I disagree. I thought the article emphasized adjusting one's self for a hostile, unreasonable work environment in which I am greatful for not having to endure.
-
6
09/04/07 | Report as spam
RE: Outrageous about Five Pitfalls.
You can tell a person's personality by how they interpret or respond to an article. I agree with the person who said they are just trying to tell you that you need to communicate your intentions. Open minded people take these articles better than defensive people take them.
This is the same thing we encounter when people discuss religion. There was a Sci-Fi show about aliens taking over human bodies. One of the people taken over was a priest. The alien infested priest read a passage of the bible that talked about how your employer can be helpful. His interpretation was that you should Never trust your employer.
-
7
08/30/07 | Report as spam
RE: The Five Dangers of Parental Leave
had three kids and my wife chose to stay while I took no time off. I think if there is a way to have one parent at home, then make it happen and don't over think the economics. Worst case scenario is you will lose a promotion or even eventually have to find another job which in most cases is a chance to do something more interesting anyway (and quit getting hung up on the pension,e etc.)
-
8
08/30/07 | Report as spam
Couldn't agree more...
...and I would find it difficult to work in such a sterile, political environment that I had to think twice before chatting up my co-workers about my daughter...sheesh! I'm fortunate I guess in that most of my colleagues have children and we can have long talks about their triumphs and tragedies.
Why does our work in America have to be so completely de-coupled from our daily lives? It just makes no sense to me. I'm all for pulling ones' weight but I'm also for granting a little forgiveness when things get tight. Go home early, come in late, take a few days off with short notice...I don't care, I'll cover for you. I just expect you to do the same for me some day.
-
9
08/31/07 | Report as spam
Couldn't agree more
Here, here,
Well said.
This article really makes the entire workforce sound like a combat zone - while I know that there are "horror stories" out there - I doubt that they are the rule, rather I expect, they are the exception.
On a whole, people are usually reasonable. As long as you don't take advantage of them, most people are happy to cover for you if you are willing to do the same for them in their time of need.
-
10
08/30/07 | Report as spam
Loss of a spouse
I took my 12 weeks when my 6 year-old son's mother died
suddenly. My employer (a group of 350 emergency physicians)
initially was sympathetic to our situation, but when I returned I had
lost the position I had earned over nine years, and instead I was
put on weekend night shifts and holidays. It is impossible to get
child care on Saturday nights, and on Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve,
etc. and I was disciplined for bringing my son to work. I quit to
care for my boy. I've cashed out my 401k and sold my house and
as of one month ago, I'm broke. But I made it seven years on my
savings. My now 13 year old just scored in the 99th percentile in
the STAR testing. The time has been worth every dime. The law
didn't help me at all.
-
11
08/30/07 | Report as spam
RE: The Five Dangers of Parental Leave
Did anyone see the movie knocked up? Is there any wisdom in refusing to let your employer know even when it is obvious?
-
12
08/30/07 | Report as spam
5 Don'ts for Employers
How about a follow-up article about the 5 don'ts for employers?
1. Don't deny promotion just because an employee takes family leave (BTW, it's against the law).
2. Don't say to an employee "You're too pregnant to travel for work. We're sending someone else in your place." It's not up to you to decide when someone's too pregnant to travel. Only a physician is qualified to determine if a woman is too pregnant to travel.
3. Don't negotiate and agree to family leave with an employee and then complain behind the employee's back that the family leave is an inconvenience for the company. Better yet, don't complain at all. It's a recepie for a hostile work environment.
4. Don't assume that people who returns to work after family leave are not interested in climbing the corporate ladder. If they worked on high-profile projects before the leave and did a great job, continue to give them high-profile projects when they return from leave.
5. Don't begin a meeting by asking the employee how their family is doing. Keep the conversation about work.
-
13
09/04/07 | Report as spam
RE: 5 don't for a company
I'm not a woman, maybe you aren't either but.... I know how you feel. A friend of mine and myself both got jobs at the same company. We both worked there for 2 years and she had to take maternity leave. They laid her off and came right out and told her it was because she was pregnant. She said she would take them to court. They told her, "Prove It". This same company also discriminates to this day against people for their age as well. It is company practice, if anyone complaines they just say "Prove It".
Even if it is against the law all a company has to say is "It was just our decission". It is really hard to prove they did stuff like this.
-
14
08/31/07 | Report as spam
RE: The Five Dangers of Parental Leave
Wow, the author of this article and the Pregnancy Politics comment must have experience working in an office of robots. If I worked at a place where I couldn't start a meeting with a 30 second story about my morning spent with my newborn son, or my wife had to treat her pregnancy as "a private matter that should be handled with great care," we'd both look for new employers. Sure, there are aspects of going on leave and return schedules,etc. that need to be handled professionally, but the tone of the article and comment conjour up a very unfriendly work environment. Business is about relationships, not just with your customers, but with your fellow employees.
-
15
08/31/07 | Report as spam
What kind of work relationship is that??
I agree. I would never work in a an environment which is unfriendly for basic human events such as having children. Pregnancy is a very public matter that cannot be hidden. I also dont agree witht the idea of treating it like a 'disability' as opposed to the life changing event that it is.
In general I thought this article was disturbing. In my company we celebrate pregnancy, marriage, and respect with an employee is grieving from a death or any other life changing transition. Treating employees as machines who don't have lives outside of work is a serious breach of being a humane employer. That is not the kinf of relationship I would ever advise cultivating with anyone, much less and employer.
-
16
08/31/07 | Report as spam
Been there, done that...DANGER!!!
I read this article with much anticipation, as I am a 'parental leave' veteran. In Canada, parents (mother or father) are entitiled to time off after a child has been born. There are different levels of time depending on who takes it. For instance the mother usually will task most of the allotted time, which can be up to one year, or it can be shared between the father and mother...in my case, my wife owns her own business, and is not eligible to take the time off as no one would be able to run her business. In this case I took 6 months parental leave, but I was entitled to 9 months. I gave my employer 1 month notice, but not without a lot of 'raised eyebrows' so to speak. After my parental leave was over, it took me almost a year again to gain thier trust...nevermind stalling my career path (passed over for promotions etc..). Since then I have had another child, but worked out a deal with my employer to telecommute on days I need to look after the my child.
Moral of the story? By all means, I would not have done anything different, as family is king, but to anyone else who is considering this, the stigma of a man looking after thier children is hard to wash off when you return...
Great article!!!
-
17
08/31/07 | Report as spam
Old School
While some of the points in this story were well taken, I am very disappointed with some of the "old school" thinking. It's a sad reality that part of this thinking is still applicable to some companies/organizations today. People should be viewed holistically. This is a short (wonderful) period in an individual's career. It should be celebrated/respected. If an employee has a proven track-record, there is no need for their current/future performance to be questioned. When co-workers/supervisors are flexible and respectful, an employee will likely give back in terms of loyalty. This has hard-dollar value! Employee turn-over has high costs. Bottom line: flexibility, respect and communication are key on both sides. Employees aren't robots, they're PEOPLE!
-
18
08/31/07 | Report as spam
RE: The Five Dangers of Parental Leave
I have a recommendation on how to 'act' when you, either Mom or Dad, return from work the first after the baby. 1st, get there a little earllier than usual for no other reason than it's a big attention getter when you roll in 20 minutes late. then everyone wants to ask how it is going etc. right when the day should be started. Also, getting there early wil allow you to hear about or read the latest company battle. You will have something to discuss right out of the blocks, instead of walking around saying "Man, I have no idea what we are doing now. 2nd, your first words out of your mouth back in the office should be "Did Smith Controls ever get that price back to us on that Johnson building rehab? Did we get another vendor? I thought they would be a problem. I want to check on that." of course you will get all the usual questions, and you will answer them, but curtly with one sentance but adding on with a big smile, "Baby's doing fine, hey, I'm having luch in the break room and brought pictures, join me" You should be preoccupied with getting your business and responsibilities going again. it's good for you to get restarted, and your co-workers realize the important part you play in the company. Most everyone has had a baby come into their lives, so show them you came to work this morning for business. 3rd. go with or organize the group for lunch at the local spot or break room. There, they can see your excitment, look at the pictures and hear every detail of the great event. That's the approprite time.
-
19
08/31/07 | Report as spam
This fits the "good ol' boys/old school" approach
Sounds like what a manager I know suggested 25-30 years ago... before he had any kids. He held it against parents that stayed home with sick kids when he gave performance reviews.
Then he had kids and it was a whole different story.
But that was a good example of how he functioned. With such a 'winning' personality, and the 'organizational politics', were such that he went from over 20 subordinates to less than 5, last I heard.
The 'parental leave thing' varies so widely between companies/organizations, states, and individual managers and coworkers, any idea of what to do and not to do should be read and its value determined in the individual's particular situation.
-
20
08/31/07 | Report as spam
RE: The Five Dangers of Parental Leave
We're going backwards people. This reminds me of the days when it was a no no for women to have photos of family in their offices.
-
21
08/31/07 | Report as spam
RE: The Five Dangers of Parental Leave
Thank you for your tips.It is great. I believe I will be more prepared when I become a would-be mother.
-
22
09/01/07 | Report as spam
Baby Blah, Blah., Blah (Turning Into Baby Central)
The first rule really hit home and I wanted to add my personal scenario to that rule, because it is something that should also be considered. I?ll keep it short. I had a co-worker who was pregnant and talked about it constantly; in meetings, on conference calls, lunch, during any conversation, you name it and she talked about it. And while everyone was happy for her, it was the kind of dialog that was followed by the sound of crickets from everyone she spoke to. It really got awkward in a weird way, and people began to comment (in private) on how sick and tired they were of hearing the same baby, blah-blah-blah. While everyone was happy for her there was an obvious lack of interest in her stories. But the additional problem that really got under my skin was during her pregnancy my wife had 3 miscarriages. While most of the time I was able to brush the stories off, there were days they got the best of me. Of course there was no way my co-worker would have known this personal information about me (or maybe others in the office with the same challenges), but again, that?s just one more reason not to ?overdo? it on the ?I?m having a baby? stories. That level of enthusiasm should be saved for their respective families.
-
23
09/04/07 | Report as spam
RE: The Five Dangers of Parental Leave
Whoever keeps replying with Blah Blah Blah, please stop. That is so unprofessional. I am sure you can come up with something more respectful. Even Yada Yada Yada is more respectful. Blah Blah Blah is as bad as telling someone to shut up. Maybe they should be quiet but there are better ways of telling someone to be quiet than to say Shut Up. Maybe in some cultures being rude is normal, but we do not live in a culture like that. Rudeness is one step above the mentality or intellect of a terrorist.
-
24
09/10/07 | Report as spam
US' parental leave practices suck
Last thing anyone should worry about is making it easy for the employer. Keep in mind that the U.S. is one of only five countries out of 173 to not guarantee some form of paid maternity leave; the others are Lesotho, Liberia, Swaziland and Papua New Guinea." (see: http://www.usatoday.com/money/workplace/2007-02-01-families-workplace_x.htm).
-
25
06/19/08 | Report as spam
I hear you!
Some people need to be more sensitive. I worked with a girl who still talked constantly about her daughter when the child was three.
ANY business and project meeting could be derailed by her discussion of birth processes, how tricky it was to breast feed after a caesarian or parking issues at the nursery. Not only did it affect perceptions of her competence it made most of the company actively avoid her (there were mismanagement issues at play as well).
-
26
05/05/09 | Report as spam
RE: The Five Dangers of Parental Leave
I'd like to find an article supporting how the people without children get screwed in the work place. I work for a private company that rewards people for popping out children, the more the better. Not only do both men and women get paid maternity leave for however many months but then they get to "work from home" after popping the children out. Right...how much work are they really getting done from home when they take care of multiple babies. I've called someone "working from home" and she was taking the call while giving her baby a bath?
People also take paid maternity leave - two years in a row. Then after they take leave, they come in and work 10-4 or don't show up at all because they are new parents...
Which means the people in the office have to pick up their slack. It's pure B.S. Now, I know this is an anomaly but their are a-holes that take advantage of maternity leave. That sucks.
